Imagine a witty title here
by It's Because I'm EMO
Summary: Parody, witty, funny and somewhat accurate. Warning:This story either has to many plots to describe hear or no plot at all.


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Disclaimer: I don't own law and order SVU or any of its characters I just wish I did unfortunately they belong to Dick Wolf so don't sue me!

Author's Note: This is indeed a parody, if you don't like it then you really shouldn't be on this page.

Olivia and Elliot sat at their desks, once again finding that there was nothing to do, which when you think about it is rather odd for the Manhattan special victims unit. They're eyes locked, they stood up at the same time and moved towards each other as if they were going to kiss. Olivia however just needed to go pee and was making a move towards the bathroom where as Elliot was just desperate for sexual interaction after his divorce and was willing to ruin his relationship with his way-too-hot partner for it.

Olivia walked to the bathroom, Elliot's eyes following her butt until she was out of the room. He considered himself lucky or unlucky depending on how you look at it for having Olivia as a partner. She was beautiful especially for a female cop with a lot of emotional baggage whose life was sorta messed up. It was strange that a cop like her could afford a nice wardrobe with the pathetic salary that she had, but Elliot figured that she tried her best to look good because otherwise guys wouldn't really want to date her.

Casey entered the room for no apparent reason, her hair once again red. She wore a red turtleneck and vaguely resembled a peacock. She started mutter something about the judge being the cause of her latest loss but really just wanted an excuse for having no idea what to do in court.

Olivia suddenly returned and said, "Elliot, Casey," she stopped for a moment to look at Casey's hideous hair and outfit before continuing, "Since we have nothing better to do with our nonexistent lives lets go for a walk, then eat way too much fast-food and somehow not gain a pound."

"Yeah," Casey agreed, "Sounds good then maybe we can find something better to do than live through our victims."

They left the precinct and walked through the park, somehow not being bothered that they were walking through the same spot where the bodies of at least half their victims were found.

When they returned to the precinct later Munch and Alex were making out behind the coffee maker. Fin suddenly came into the precinct attempting to be 'gansta' because that's his role as the African American. He pointed at Alex and Munch and said, "Does anyone else think that it's messed up that a sixty-something year old man and our former thirty-something year old ADA who technically doesn't exist are making out?" Fin said before leaving the room and not being seen for the rest of the day.

Out of the blue Velez jumped into the precinct through a window and shot Alex who in turn became an orb of blue light and shot out through the window never to be seen again on earth because she was an alien and had to return to her home planet.

Then there was a poof and a gun magically appeared out of nowhere floating in the air, although no one was holding it. It shot Velez who died. What everyone didn't know was that Alex had magical powers because she was an alien and it was really her who shot Velez as her final revenge before leaving earth forever.

Elliot who hadn't really said or done anything that day except stare at Olivia's butt pointed at Velez's body and said, "See that? When a magical gun appears and shots you without anyone pulling the trigger and you die, that's what you call karma. Meaning that you're an ass hole."

"Elliot, I'm so proud of you!" Olivia said, "Instead of expressing how Velez was an ass hole by punching a hole through the wall you talked, good job!"

Olivia's obvious use of sarcasm and not noticing Elliot's attempt at a joke made Elliot feel sad and for the sake of character development he cried then and there, hugged Olivia and admitted his obvious love for her and vowed never to get angry again except when interrogating victims or when something or someone made him mad.

Nobody noticed Munch who was obviously distraught after losing another long-term lover as he approached Casey who hadn't been mentioned in a while, "Even though I might die of old age by the time you're fifty why don't we get married?" He asked, "I need a new wife to distract me for a while."

Casey who rarely had boyfriends because she had no sense of fashion and was desperate agreed. Cragen who had mysteriously been gone all day (though it didn't matter because he never did any work anyways) came into the precinct followed by a group of men in black suits wearing dark and sinister looking sunglasses.

"These are some workers from the government, they're um here to make sure everything is going…good."

"I really admire your use of the English language captain." Elliot said sarcastically Cragen however didn't realize that Elliot was being sarcastic and thanked him. Munch of course characteristically went into one of his government conspiracies rants forgetting all about being engaged to Casey. Melinda and Huang appeared in a sudden flash of light, "Hi." Melinda said Huang just stood there awkwardly because he's the psychiatrist and Elliot was hissing at him.

Melinda decided to take that opportunity to announce that she and Huang were quitting the team because nobody ever paid much attention to them and also Elliot's hissing even creped the emotionless Huang out.

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Author's note: So did you like it? Hate it? Should I continue? PLEASE REVIEW!


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